Somehow this was the

Somehow posting these pics here are the only way I can get at them (again)

. So I am.

What is going on.

These are two recent paintings that are the beginning of an intended suite of works. Though not limited to, I have a dozen or so 10.75" x 10.75" panels that I am working with and allowing me the chance to do a series but they are also ready to hang in a way that some of the materials I have been using are not.
I have chosen local cityscapes as a theme both as an accessible and recognizable subject matter but also as a way to practice some intentional technique choices. A way to see them in action as it were. Specifically brushwork that is generally more suggestive and laid down more judiciously. I feel there is a point where I "over work" some pieces and I am trying to undo this habit. This will lead to richer tones than I have historically used.

Canine Technologies

Due to a belief that mandrake root emits a deadly cry when pulled from the ground people used to tie dogs to the plants and have them pull out the root. I find this an awesome solution to a perceived problem. With that kind of clever thinking can there not be a opportunity for other dog based technologies. Yes I know there are already dog sleds, seeing eye dogs, guard dogs, shepherds, dogs to sniff out drugs, bombs, bed bugs cancer, and even hairless arthritis treatment dogs. So perhaps this demonstrates the existence of dog-based-technologies better than support the room for it. i started this post with a desire to slip into the absurd but it seems that with some little thought there is actually loads of dog uses that are being befitted from. I hate it when a joke goes sour. "sigh"
r

Smokey and the Bandit

As it happened that Smokey and the Bandit was on the television at the bar were was having my two shift drinks I was watching it. The thing that struck me was the role of the CB (Citizens Band) in the movie. It was strangely revolutionary and anti-establishment in its own way. They used the CB to talk, plot and help get Bandit through the hazards of his outlaw life. I should mention that he was not an outlaw in the sense of Robin Hood or some such hero to the people as he was doing it for money, or at least he was financed by the money.
In a time were we take for granted the connection we enjoy through cell phones and Internet; their, the characters, use of the CB was no less effective. Additionally they got to have cool "handles". Which I guess might still be true with on line user names. Regardless, over the decades of ever increasing technology the 70's version of globalization's connectedness seems at best quaint but more likely archaic, yet it, in the movie, was very effective and showed a potential isn't usually thought of. It might seem like comparing carrier pigeons to radio but still it feels like for the time and place it was an impressive bit of infrastructure for "the people" to have access to. An infrastructure that was generally free and not marketed in the way the world we know it is.
I know it was a movie but seeing the use of communication over distances and instantaneously was something I didn't appreciate then. It was an example of an ideal, a community with a common ethic despite distance and anonymity of the persons involved. I'm not saying that this can't be done now or long before the 70's but i just didn't expect to see it in Smokey and the Bandit.

GOLD

Closet Alchemist

In regards to my concerns for money I recently vocalized the fantasy of turning lead into gold. I was told to write it all down. I do not know if this was meant to exorcise my issues or what. Here it is.
I do not know why this escapism is better than simply finding treasure, winning the lottery or the most fantastic of all, inheriting some money. Perhaps it is the nature of escapist fantasy that it is more involved or it simply takes longer to ponder as a way to savor the vacation from your own life. For some reason the idea of making gold is rational enough that I feel that the idea of an element close to gold’s density is necessary, something heavy. My fiction couldn’t allow for the creation of matter only the reconfiguration. Otherwise it would all be silly or unlikely. I suppose the best escapes are the ones threaded with the most reality.
Due to the mental damage I’ve done to myself reading thousands of comic books, tens of thousands really, my transmutation daydreams seem to involve super heroes. I can’t say what usually is involved in such flights of fancy; magic spells, super science or aliens but for me it is superheroes. I recall that early ideas incorporated the use of super powers belonging to Firestorm: the Nuclear Man. He had many abilities one of which was to reconfigure matter with the energy blasts that shot from his hands. Also his head was on fire.
Strangely these musing involved a certain amount of restraint as to how much gold could be made. It seems to be both an issue of upsetting the market and raising suspicion as to the origins of the gold. This also brought into question what could be transmuted. That is to say what is a likely shape for gold? Would rocks be more likely than a statue, what is the least curious form to find gold in? Why were these details more important than what I would do with the money?
The latest bout of gold fever is somewhat different than past ones. Firstly it involves the questions of “whom do I sell gold to?” I could find out but otherwise I have no idea of how to go about the exchange of metal for tender. It also focuses on the practicality in using lead, which has me asking how many lead mallets would be a good amount to transmute? That is to say what is exactly the right amount of mallet heads. For some reason I associate lead mainly with the mallets, almost exclusively.
The other odd thing is that there was a shift on personal control. Previously I would have Firestorm’s, Element Lad’s or whomever’s powers and do the transforming myself. This last set seemed to involve a second party, specifically the Silver Surfer. He would in fact do the deed for me. Now this is where it gets weird.
Why the Silver Surfer or why not be the Silver Surfer myself? Part of this storyline involved a reluctance of SS to create the gold. His argument being that not only is gold of false value but money in itself will not give happiness. I would then argue that it would give me the luxury of choice and freedom (arguably illusions themselves). Still he would be unwilling. I would then offer a wager. He, the Silver Surfer, would transmute lead for me and go on his way (SS is not from earth and perhaps important to the whole yarn is that he spends his time off world, traveling the space ways) and return a year or so later. If in that time I did not better myself or do something with my life he was free to take away those things that I accumulated in that time, effectively taking the gold back. I felt confident that I would of course rise to the occasion and be the person I could be with the chance I had.
So these are my gold fantasies. At least on paper I recognize the cautionary tales of money and happiness. Perhaps though I really need to focus on the advice of the Silver Surfer. What do I need to be happy, what does it mean to do something with your life? Why is this my fantasy?

adrift

It has become more and more in my face that I need to either adjust my attitude or figure out how to live in this world. Seriously though I cannot find my place. This might be charming for a teen or even a twenty something but I'm looking at two score years.
It isn't even that I do not know what i would like or what I'd settle for it is just that there seems to be no bridge between here and there. I can accept that this is my own doing if not just my responsibility but that isn't solving the issue at hand.

So I need to be brave and strong and what ever trite little words you want to put in there. Something needs to happen one way or the other.

This isn't what i wanted to say or talk about.

Despite all the crap in my life I am in a position to make it what I want. One of the issues is that I cannot see where the line between Just my perception and the reality of the situation is. I am also saddled with a provincial world view. I cannot see past getting a job (which has somehow become a huge issue). AHHHHHHHHHH
I'll post this but I am not saying what i want to say. sorry.

the same old question

I am going through a "creative suite for dummies" book and realize that I need to actually do this to learn it. I have no doubts I can do it but I am directionless as to what to do. This is a question that plagues me and am often asked with out an answer. "What do you want to do?"

With out getting into the question of whether or no this question is relevant, I can never answer this question.
Left to my own device I can keep busy, but to move forward in life and learning is not easy for my as I have some sort of near sightedness or imagination break down.

I need to break this cycle. As of this writing the whole aforementioned dummies book on digital media will be my .......voodoo doll of my own larger life. By leaving my comfort zone and doing stuff for my own sake (not that I don't do that anyhow but if I am not with my own agenda or someone else's it is hard to press forward) I can affect those changes in my life at large. At least that is a theory.

So what will I do? I don't know. How to fix my life, I don't know.
ttfn
r.